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Updated every weekday.         Please vote!    

 

2009-12-23

Oh, that's right, this is an Abrahamic week! Technically, Noah only had six days to do all of this stuff, because you're not allowed to work on the seventh day... because God's lazy.

One thing that the bible doesn't talk about is the inclusion of plants on the ark. Nearly all of the plants on the Earth can't survive being totally submerged in water for an entire year. In order to keep plants in existence, Noah would have had to include about half a million plant samples from every single species on Earth. One argument is that Noah could have simply taken the seeds of all of these plants, which take up less space. But that would still entail finding and identifying every plant on Earth, waiting for the plant to go to seed, collecting the seeds, figuring out a way to store them safely for a year, preventing the thousands of seed-eating birds and rodents on the ark from eating the seeds, planting them after the water dries up, nurturing half a million plants to adulthood, and finally getting specific insects to pollinate them all to propagate the species. No problem!

Oh yes, that tiny dot above the ark's door... that's the one and only window of the ark. It's drawn to scale to show just how useless it is.

 

Comments

Ray writes:

 

That's just ridiculous. Telling someone they have 1 week when they only have 6 days and then making them complete a near impossible task in that time.


Still, you just have to wonder about God. Apparently, it[God] will kill you for not resting on the same day he does.

Well, unless you don't worship it, because as we've seen so far, there have been a lot of non-worshippers who probably didn't sleep on the 7th day, and they didn't die!

Laura writes:

 

Well in catholic school they explained to me that the reason we rest on the seventh day isn't because of lazyness but so that we have time to take a break from the insanity of the modern day world and reconnect with our family even if it's for a day. Basically god calls a time out to help us deal with the stress of life and to let us forget even if it's for a litle while all of the worries of our world... At least that's what they said. I don't know if Noah could ever complete the task of finding plants seeing as how there are so many and there are a few hybrids that are considered to be a different kind of plant than the parents that can only exsist in certain conditions.

Asa writes:

 

What about day six ?

TheAlmightyGuru writes:

 

Whoops! There was a typo in yesterday's comic. It was listed as day 5, but Monday's comic was day 5, so yesterday was actually day 6!

Problem solved, crisis averted.

Winterset writes:

 

Ray, what do you mean "near" impossible? You see some rational way for that task to be completed in any amount of time?

Mr-know-it-all writes:

 

Sure!
He could have moved everybody else in the world to aid the cause, as a pyramid scheme of sorts. And he could have done whichever promises it would entail, since they were going to be killed off anyways!

Ray writes:

 

@ Winterset: Hey, I didn't see what the task was.

And besides, the situation is hypothetical, and therefore fiction. And in fiction, ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!! [/Mock cheeriness.]

Ray writes:

 

Made a mistake; above commenter is me. There is no poster with the name "!". At least, not to my knowledge.

! writes:

 

yes, there is...

TheAlmightyGuru writes:

 

Fixed!

I've got to get a log-in system here. Partially to keep user names standard so people don't accidentally/purposely use someone else's name, partially to decrease the random spam I have to delete.

Soon...

Katy writes:

 

A year & a half later, still no long-in system ... *tsk*

;-) J/K - giving you a hard time, etc.

TheAlmightyGuru writes:

 

Most of the spam has been dealt with by a few shrewd PHP tricks, and the people here have been adult enough that I haven't needed to implement a log-in system. So far...

 

Oh the irony!